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“They can get it”, should they though?

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Good morning and good morning folks,

Today we’re talking about when to introduce sex into the relationship. Short, simplified answer, when there’s intimacy already established in the relationship. Sleeping with somebody doesn’t birth intimacy. Anybody who’s ever been casual with sex can attest to this, especially those of us who’ve ever had one-night stands. I’ll speak for myself here, but sex has never made me want to get to know anybody on a deeper level. Ironic because scripture’s language for sex is knowing someone. They “knew” each other. And as far as deeper levels go, well the only depth a partner and I ever achieved was the depth … I’ll let you take over finishing that sentence.

The problem with intimacy is that it takes a while to build. Another added layer of difficulty that comes with building intimacy is that one party can’t build it for the other party. Both people in the relationship have to work towards intimacy. If you’ve ever been on dates, you learn very quickly that not everybody wants to build intimacy. In some situations, some people believe that they shouldn’t have to build intimacy with people they haven’t been intimate with. “I need to know what I’m getting myself into” is one way I’ve heard it phrased. Another way it’s ever been put is “test the goods. You don’t buy a car without first test driving it”. Ain’t that the truth. You don’t buy a car without first test driving it, but when sex is the only criteria for building intimacy, that’s the equivalent of only test driving the car to make sure that the AC works, and skimming over the other features. Because the AC was your main priority, you buy the car and later find out that the dealer sold you a car with a known oil leak problem. Why am I bringing the dealer into this? Because God’s not the only one who places people in our lives.

I hope you enjoyed today’s post as much as I enjoyed writing it for you. Of all the dimensions of wellness we touch on here at Rea, sexual wellness is my favorite. If you’re ever curious what the dimensions of wellness I talk about are, I list them in the “About Rea” tab. Have a wonderful day everybody, and you already know the vibe,

Hold your peace, mind your business, and drink water

Xoxo,

P.M

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